Realisation of life

I've not really blogged for a while, things have been a tad hectic and life has a way of reminding you how unimportant the internet is sometimes. Bout a month ago I was sorting the recycling out in the back yard while the other half put the boys to bed. It was a warm evening so all the doors and windows were open and all was quiet in the neighbourhood.

And then 4 gunshots rang out close by and there was a lot of screaming. My nextdoor neighbour climbed up on to his bin and looked over the wall into the house next door but one behind us and shouted "someone has been shot"

My heart was still and I felt stone cold as Noodledoodle's window faces that house. I could hear him crying so I legged it up stairs as my other half came out of Beans bedroom. I shot into Noodledoodle's room and picked him up before opening the curtains and looking down into the house behind.

I will never forget this moment, not because it was gorey and I saw a dead man or anything, turns out the guy was shot in the arm, but I won't forget the woman running round with a baby bout the same age as Noodledoodle in her arms. Or the confused boy about 6 standing there crying. I won't forget looking at the 2 bullet holes in the window facing Noodledoodle's room and my heart felt sick that any stray could have come close to him. But those poor kids in that house? Why did they have to witness that.

My heart still stands still thinking about it.
The house stands empty. The landlord won't let them back.
I hope he doesn't.

But it makes me wonder why people would make decisions that lead to a man shooting at them though a window KNOWING your children were in there. It makes me wonder how its fair that some friends of mine can't have children at all and would give a great home, but people who make stupid choices are allowed 2. It makes me angry that these people brought this into my life.

I don't live in a bad neighbourhood, but it's tainted now. Not that we can do anything about it mind you, but I worry for my boys. What kind of a world do we live in that allow people to do this? That have people who feel they need to do this? That have people who think it's ok to do this?

So i put down my blog, and we went to the park, to enjoy life now. The leaves falling from the trees, puddle jumping in wellies, Making biscuits, playing in the sand pit... mummys way of making the world a nice place I hope.